“Then one evening they were both in the kitchen and I walked in and asked ‘Are you having an affair?’
“Mum looked me in the eye and just said ‘Yes’ but there was absolutely no emotion on her face. I think Neil shrugged and nodded.
“I started screaming and shouting ‘You’re my mum, it’s not right!’ but she looked at me coldly and said ‘I love him and it’s me he wants, not you. Look at yourself – you’re fat and ugly and I’ve had four kids and look great’.
“I was in such a state that the next few days are all a bit of a blur. I actually stayed in that house while Neil moved out of OUR room and into my mum and dad’s marital bed.
“I’d idolised my mum and she went and did this to me.”
Six weeks later Neil and Mandy moved out and Dea was left to bring up her sisters aged 12 and 13. She said: “It was the ultimate irony – I had taken on Mum’s role and she had taken my man.” Her mum and Neil set up home together and wed in 2006.
Dea said: “By then I’d decided they were welcome to each other.
Perfect
“For a year or so I was a real mess but one day I woke up and just thought ‘Why are you letting them ruin your life?’ I’d had enough of being a victim.
“I’d lost a lot of weight and when I started going out with friends I was actually getting some male attention. I went out with a couple of guys and started to realise I wasn’t the fat and ugly loser my mum wanted me to be.”
Three months ago she finally got the wedding she had dreamed of when she tied the knot with Adam Aubery whom she met while working in a burger van.
Dea, who has two sons aged three and 20 months with Adam, 24, said: “I had the most perfect dress, nine bridesmaids, a horse and carriage – the works. There was only one moment when I thought of Mum. I was having my picture taken with Dad and I suddenly thought ‘Look what you are missing’.
“I’ll never forgive Mum and Neil but now I’m happier than I ever thought possible.”
